Kelvin RATNAM Obituary

We were very sad to hear of Kelvin's passing. Kelvin and Carol have been close friends of ours for many decades. Kelvin was a colleague of Raoul's in the Head Office of the former Department of Social Welfare. With a strong academic background and application to policy work, Kelvin was a good team worker. We, Ruth and Raoul, worked closely with Kelvin on the Board of Temple Sinai where he was again a deeply committed colleague. Raoul had known Carol since she graduated from Victoria University. A bond of friendship between the Ratnams and the Ketkos became a strong one. We were with them throughout the very stressful losses of their 2 daughters and admired Kelvin & Carol hugely for their strength and courage. During the 40 years of their warm and close marriage we saw them rise above many challenges. Like many others we enjoyed many spicy meals with them produced with precision by chef Kelvin. He and Raoul were politics junkies and "chewed the fat" for hours. Ruth & I moved to Auckland 10 years ago. On several occasions when we flew to Wellington we were offered and accepted warm hospitality staying with, alternatively, the Youngs and the Ratnams. Many contributors to this guest book have mentioned their admiration of Kelvin's determination to help make the world a better place. We, too, will miss his many fine attributes. We add our condolences to Hugh and his courageous and admirable mother.

Dear Carol
The loss of Kelvin will leave a big gap in your life. But I hope the memories you have of him will help to sustain you.
My memories, from my first meeting of him many years ago at Vic, are of a friendly, gentle, smiling, outward-looking man. He was hospitable, interested in people, events and learning - I remember a conversation he had with Gary last time we were at your place where he was keen to discuss the best way of fixing that wonky dining room chair!
Please know that we are thinking of you.
Love, Clare and Gary

I am but one of many who felt so welcomed by Kelvin's warm smile at the Temple door. My thoughts and love are with you, Carol.
Mary Green

We feel your all embracing presence.

We wish you Blissful Peace always.

Then there was the 'lets go tramping story': I mentioned to Kelvin I was going tramping in a couple of weeks. "Oh I did the Milford track? not so long ago". Oh yeah, well then do you want to come along? We're going into the Tararuas.
In due course Kelvin turned up, with this monstrous pack, that weighed 2 tonne! I could hardly lift it. It felt like he must have 2 sacks of cement in it.

Wow Kelvin! What have you got in there? Well I thought you might like some curry. I did, despite having planned all food for the tramp. So we opened up the pack. Maybe 3 Tip Top ice cream containers of frozen curry, for 3 days! Hey Kelvin, there's no way we can eat 7kg of curry! Then there were the clothes, : for antarctica! You only need 1 shirt, 1 raincoat, 1 tea shirt etc etc. We deloaded his pack of 90% of the curry and 40% of clothes and other bits and pieces and off we went. Well he struggled, but at least we got there, oh! and enjoyed a scrumptious curry! Along with many laughs.

Oh the memories! Travel well Kelvin in the big park in the sky. I know those you will share your curry with will be appreciative!

When I first met Kelvin about 2 decades ago, I was captivated by his delightful engaging personality, his profound interest in International Affairs, but above all his sense of humour, or at least his kind personality meant he always generously laughed at things I thought were funny.

As Chair of the Wellington Branch of the New Zealand Institute of International Affairs, I was delighted to have the Committee accept his nomination as Events Coordinator and more delighted when he accepted the Committee's offer. He served in that capacity from 2004 2008. This required him to coordinate a topic, speaker, venue, draft the event notice and to pass that that to the membership, and then facilitate the actual event, every 2 weeks. He then took on the role of Branch Secretary with monthly meeting agenda's, minutes and other correspondence. This position he held until 2012 and then he continued as a committee member for several more years.

During this time, he cemented the branch glue and culture by organising periodic lunches. It was a great time to socialise, build constructive relationships and enjoy each other's company outside of NZIIA business'.

His community service and his friendship are dearly missed. His family can be very proud of his achievements knowing his contributions to society were valued and appreciated.

Peter Nichols

Proud to have known you Kelvin. Your contribution to a better world greatly appreciated. I shall remember with affection our NZIIA dinner conversations with you and Carol. She is very proud of you as we are of her.

Rod Alley

Carol, Hugh, we were so shocked to hear of Kelvin's passing. Hard to believe that he greeted us at Temple so recently! Our most sincere condolences, we are thinking of you and sending our love at this difficult time. Wishing you long life.

Dear Carol
I needed to withdraw shortly after conclusion of the service for Kelvin at midday and did not manage to speak with you. I did want to register my thanks and admiration for such a warm-hearted occasion which brought out so many aspects of his rich and varied life. I hope that this and many other messages you will receive will each do their work in providing you and your family with some solace, especially during the first days after his passing. He was a truly valued long time supporter of the Institute International Affairs. With sadness. Anand Satyanand

Dearest Carol and Hugh, I am so sad to learn of Kelvin's death. What a mensch! What a kind, intelligent, loyal, loving, human being! And as I think about you family, I cry that you should once again be grieving. Carol, you and Kelvin were so much of the community when I served Temple Sinai. I did not always agree with you but I honestly believe you and Kelvin kept the Jewish community a priority in your lives. I hope, Carol, that you feel some measure of the love back that you and Kelvin spent so much time cultivating. Please know I think of you often, and warmly. Love and strength to you while you mourn the loss and I wish you pride and gratitude for the many gifts Kelvin offered you in life and still now. Love, Johanna and Mark Hershenson

It was a joy to meet Kelvin as he greeted everyone on the way into Sinai. He capably struck that rare balance between security and welcoming. At Temple Sinai- Reno we can only hope to attain any balance such as Kelvin kept with such apparent ease and grace. Kelvin was a Lamed Vavnick holding the world together. Carol and Hugh, we are thinking of you and hope Kelvin's memory may be a blessing.

Like a drop of rain that's merged with the ocean, you are with the whole, timeless, limitless. Rest in peace in the cradle of our common creator.I'll see you in my dreams.

Carol and Hugh, I was sad to hear of Kelvin's passing. I have fond memories of the curries he cooked. Thinking of you both.
Shelo tedah od tza'ar

Dear Carol
Mary and I are deeply saddened by Kelvin's passing. Kelvin was my friend from the day we met at Wanganui Boy's College in 1970. We stayed in the same hostel and attended the same class together for a year before we went on our separate ways to make a life in New Zealand. In the last fifty years, I am glad and proud to hear of Kelvin's work and dedication to the Wellington community at the Temple. I treasured the time Kelvin and you visited and stayed with us in Christchurch in March this year. I have many fond memories of Kelvin and our sincere condolences to you Carol and to Kelvin's Malaysian family. We will be thinking of you in the days ahead without Kelvin.

Dear Carol, Kind, gentle (firm if he had to be), always eager to help and optimistic despite all the challenges and hardships that life brought. That's the Kelvin we see in the photo, that's the Kelvin we knew, loved and will always remember. From here in Israel, his passing came as a complete shock and I only hope he knew how much we admired him and appreciated all he did for us, and many others. We know that the special love and connection between you was part of what made Kelvin special and we send you our love and prayers. Henry, Bila and family.

Carol, my heart breaks for you. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Kelvin was always welcoming , friendly and I have many fond memories from my time at Sunday school and beyond. Wishing you a long life. Love Jess

Carol - Shane and I were so sorry to hear of Kelvins passing. He was such a presence at Temple Sinai. We wish you long life and comfort in your memories.

Dear Carol
I can't begin to put into words how sorry I am at your tragic loss. I remember our patterning days with darling Lydia and the amazing meals we were spoilt with afterwards. At the Temple too, Kelvin was always such a welcoming presence. He will be greatly missed by everyone who knew him. I wish you and Hugh Long Life. With love, Betty

Carol it's marion pawson here. Our lives have touched lightly in a number of different places. Our children. Clyde Quay school. Landmark. I remember the warmth of the home you and Kelvin created for yourselves and your children, and your wider family. It was clear that Kelvin was a great Dad. And that together you were a great couple. I send you my love.

We offer our heartfelt condolences to you and your family. May Kelvin's soul be at peace with our Heavenly Father.

Julian, Jessica, Zachary, Zoe and Zavier, MALAYSIA

Dear Carol
Truly saddened to hear of Kelvin's passing. Our friendship goes back close to 5 decades and so many wonderful memories. Kelvin was a kind and outstanding gentleman and he will be missed. My most profound condolences Carol. Do take care.

Dear Carol

Not only a loss for you but also to the community. Our prayers with you. Manjt and Geetha

Dear Carol, dear Hugh
Sending you love and strength, tenderness and blessings. May you feel the power of grace and be held by all the love that flows your way at this so sad time.
In sorrow we bend as one reed
We love and we loose... It is so painful
but nothing, can destroy this boundless love.
- we are all just walking each other home

Kelvin will be missed - he was usually the first person I saw as I came to the gate of Temple Sinai and I got used to his steady presence in the community. I think that for some time, I will continue to expect him to be in the room or at the door welcoming everyone. Sending much love and support.

Dear Carol
Was so sad to hear of Kelvins passing. He was truly a lovely man and I always enjoyed his company.
I will be thinking of you Wednesday and sending you lots of love
Debbie❤

Dear Carol,
I was deeply saddened to learn of the passing of Kevin from my daughter Belinda Lithgow. The message you put on fb brought tears to my eyes I could feel the love from reading your words . I am with you and your family at this time of sorrow and I will especially be with you all in spirit on Wednesday during the time of the funeral.
Love n blessings from Pamela Duncan xo

Carol, my dear, we are so sad and shocked to hear the news of Kelvin's passing and cannot imagine the grief you must feel. We hope, that as time progresses you can find comfort in the memories of your life together. As a couple you hold a special place in our hearts we have wonderful memories meeting you both down the years in different parts of the world. Kelvin and you also made a big impact on our daughter Isha when she spent time in NZ. Kelvin was a special man and we feel blessed to have known him.
Please take care.

Carol, I am so very sad to read of Kelvin leaving us. My thoughts are with you on Wednesday when you farewell your beloved husband and sincere sympathy as you face life ahead without him.

Kelvin had so many sterling attributes that are readily admired. He was certainly one of those special gentlemen that will be remembered by us and the communities he touched for many years to come. You have good reason to be proud of him. We will dearly miss him.
With much respect
Ralph and Letizia Green

We are heartbroken to hear about Kelvin's sudden passing. It doesn't seem so long ago that we saw you on Auckland. Wishing you only happy memories Carol. Wishing you a long life. Much love, Denise, Garth and Reuben.

I am sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you Carol

Dear Carol and Family I'm very sad over Kelvin's passing I have a lot of fond wonderful memories of our time s together. My sincere condolences Carol my thoughts are with you. Love Mike

Dearest Carol
My heart goes out to you at this very sad time. Kelvin was always very friendly to me and a true gentleman.
You both seemed to me to be such a unit and a lovely couple.
I send you love and hugs and strength.

A dear and true friend and a June buddy. His care and concern helped me through rookie days in NZ. Have known him since our childhood days in Malacca. Will hang on to beautiful memories, go in peace and luv dear Kelvin. Dear Carol heartfelt condolences. Holding you in prayer.

Dear Carol, we're deeply saddened and thinking about you and your loved ones, wishing you long life. Kelvin's kind, warm heart will always be present with us. Sending you much love, Desiree, Yury and family

Dear Carol, I'm thinking of you at this very hard time. I am sure Kelvin will be missed by all, a very good-humoured and friendly person, a very nice person to engage with at Temple, very staunch member for a very long time. May the love of friends carry through your grief. Very kind regards, Shayna Levick xxx

Dear Carol
Our thoughts are with you at this very sad time
Kelvin was always intersted in our lives andhow we were.
He was a true gentleman. Much admired by all who knew him

I can't believe you've gone dear Kelvin. You were like a big brother to me. I've cried many tears and lit Buddhist joss sticks for you. Our 50 years of friendship starting in New Zealand has been fun and fantastic and a learning curve in your passion for Judaism. Much love to you Carol. Hope you visit us in Melbourne one day when we're Covid clear. RIP Kelvin dear friend.

Carol, I knew Kelvin only in the last few years, but formed such an impression of him as a kind, responsible gentleman. It was always a pleasure to be in his company.
I wish you comfort from family, friends, community and memories. Long life!